


A new World Order

by alis_grave_nil



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel 616, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Winter Soldier (Comics)
Genre: AU, Ableism, Abuse of Authority, Anal Sex, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, BAMF Phil Coulson, Blow Jobs, Bottom Bucky, Bucky Barnes Feels, Canon-Typical Violence, Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Declarations Of Love, Dom Steve Rogers, Double Agent Brock Rumlow, Drama & Romance, Dubious Consent, F/M, Gallows Humor, HYDRA Trash Party, HYDRA Trash Party-Averted, M/M, Mild Smut, Minor Matt Murdock/Foggy Nelson, Not Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Compliant, Past Relationship(s), Protective Bucky Barnes, Psychological Trauma, Rape/Non-con Elements, Red Room, Rough Sex, Sexual Violence, Slice of Life, Some Humor, Steve Feels, Steve Rogers Feels, Sub Bucky Barnes, Vigilante!Brock Rumlow, Vigilante!Bucky, extreme violence, same with Sitwell, sub Brock Rumlow
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-05
Updated: 2016-03-12
Packaged: 2018-05-24 20:53:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 17,517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6166546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alis_grave_nil/pseuds/alis_grave_nil
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Brock Rumlow use to be the murderous vigilante Crossbones ,until him and his lover turned partner Jamie Winter are caught by SHEILD and Jamie vanishes.Years Later Rumlow meets the infamous Winter Soldier and realizes that he's Jamie and MIA war hero Bucky Barnes .When Rumlow becomes his handler,he starts breaking The Asset's programming,while working to expose Hydra .After turning him over to the Avengers,and being granted immunity,he disappears into obscurity,only for Barnes to make his way back to Rumlow.<br/>All Brock wanted was to change the world--abusing and torturing war prisoners was NOT what he signed up for</p><p><i></i>'Ain't you an' the Star Spangled Man with the plan suppose to be soulmates?',Brock asked,opening his beer.He was careful not to look at Bucky,his James.</p><p>"He only loved the old me.I'm a monster to him.He was in love with Bucky Barnes--You're in love with the Winter Soldier.I can be Winter and Still be Bucky,but I can't be Bucky when I'm the Winter Soldier.You understand this",he said,stepping closer,his head lowered,uncertain.Then he looked up with Innocent eyes.</p><p>"You're the one who really loves me",he said.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. HAIL HYDRA

**Author's Note:**

> Gotta stop these early in the morning fics...gotta stop.  
> But this is a fuck twisted AU in which rumlow got to bucky early,its canon that bucky dipped on hydra urning the winter soldier comic run--almost sure he went to brooklyn or was it chicago---anyway,in tis story it was brooklyn.so him and rumlow had crazy time-punisher style and then things hit the fan.  
> Also this story is REALLY psychological.Some weird shit happens,some really creepy stuff,fucked up relationships,etc.I wanted to focus on some pretty heavy concepts here .Also though Rumlow's not a villain here--he's not a nice dude.Period.  
> Also ,Bucky Barnes here is somewhat like the comics in that he is a bit more aware of shit than he was in the movie.So this is a composite Winter Soldier.His relationship with Steve is like the movie-verse,but shades of comic stuff shows up--like Lukin

  
  
\--  
There were times when they went on long missions,on missions that lasted long enough that The Asset would start to remember things.  
  
This was why he needed a handler.  
  
Someone to give him his drugs to give him instruction,someone to make him forget.  
  
And those were the most painful times of them all.Until Rumlow came.Brock Rumlow who had become part of Hydra because he saw his family die and didn't want any more war in this world.Blood brothers died in war in Afghanistan,his mother and father killed in a mall shooting,his best friend killed by the police because of his race and his daughter killed because of a suicide bomber while on a trip to Washington DC with her classmates.  
  
Rumlow started taking things into his own hands.  
  
Dishonorable discharge left him with nothing but time,alot of time to think of what was left of his life and then he knew what he had to do.  
  
He had to change the world.  
  
And it just so happened he would do it one corpse at a time.  
  
His first victim off the battlefield was the cop who killed his friend for being black--that's not what they said it was ,but that was the reason. After that,he got himself arrested so he could kill the man who killed his parents.He even converted to Islam so he could kill the whole cell that took his daughter and her friends.He would've went further,finished it,but he couldn't bring himself to kill the people in the mosque,they did nothing wrong and if they did,they had to answer to Allah.

Brock though was more than aware he was going to hell so he dare not set foot near the mosque or any religious place again for that matter.  
  
The world was still ugly,dirty,cruel place.  
  
It was time to clean house.  
  
It was easy to start knocking off cops,politicians.The bastards were too arrogant for their own good.  
  
It was only one day that he made a mistake.He met and fell in love with the Winter Soldier.Or Jamie Winters as was being called.  
  
The story Jamie spun was that he was a war veteran having problems coming in from the cold.  
He certainly acted like a war veteran,Rumlow knew the signs.The things he said about his experiences,sounded about right too.  
  
When Jamie explained that the world was cruel,talked about those ugly things that the greedy ,the powerful and the foolish did,the misguided ways of man ,Brock was in love.  
  
Fuck all if Jamie was a homeless guy with one arm and spaces in his head,Brock was in love.He had found someone who understood things the way he did.  
  
When Winter sighed,leaned back against the wall off his abandoned house and simply said "For this world to be a better place,people have to die.There are people out there,too--to evil too fucked up ...theyuse us like toy soldiers,throw us in the trash.The bystanders have no names in their chest games,just dust on the edge of the boards and the soldiers,the fighters,the ones like us,dogs of war,we're just pawns for Kings.Kings who's only queen is money--when is it ever going to end?",he said distantly.  
  
Those words echoed in his ears,the light shown on Jamie's face through the holes in his boarded up windows,and after Brock had washed his hair,trimmed his face,he caught a good glimpse at his gorgeous features and that forlorn look.  
  
'When is it gonna end?'..  
  
Brock sat close,his heart pounding in his chest,taking Jamie by his one hand.  
  
"I don't know if I can do it but I'll damn sure try",he said .  
  
Jamie eyed him,they eyed each other .  
  
"Don't like bullies,don't like people who just push everyone else around--injustice.The world could be better,it could.We can make it better",Brock said.  
  
Jamie smiled the first real smile that he had seen on his face ever.  
  
"Sounds impossible,but I'd like to believe in a real hero like you",Jamie said.  
  
"Whoa,slow down.Just a kid from Brooklyn,who wants to do his part",Brock said.  
  
Jamie paused a moment,his eyes distant.  
  
_-Ready to follow Captain America into the jaws of death?-_  
  
_-No,just the scrawny kid from Brooklyn who doesn't know how to back down from a fight-_  
  
"Me too",he said chuckling and it was the most beautiful ,human thing.  
  
Jamie in his tattered clothes,and his broken house and his broken body and broken heart,Brock made him smile,made him laugh.They both laughed now,happiness laughter,the best kind.  
And after they laughed they kissed.  
  
They kissed for a long time,kissed until the air got colder and the streetlights got brighter and the night got darker and Brock had drawn blankets over the windows to kill the hypothermic breeze.  
  
"I wanna take you away from this place.You'll freeze",Brock said. A soft smile played on Jamie's lips and he chuckled,lying on his dingy old mattress.  
  
"I been out in the cold for so long,I don't know how to come in",he said quietly.Rumlow stood by the window lighting up a cigarette.  
  
"Oh yeah? Well neither do I.I just wanna take care of you",Brock said.Jamie frowned a moment,as if in thought.Then again,another smile,this one shy and bashful.  
  
"Okay.I trust you",he said.  
  
And so Brock took him in,took him on the road.The heavy case in the side of the room contained a cybernetic arm Rumlow never knew about because Jamie was too shaken to show his body just yet.But he did when the time came ,and Rumlow needed a man on his six,an Asset , a Soldier. He rose to the occasion with his Sniper riffle and they cleaned up their city.  
  
First the street gangs,the police force,the Mayor who was so that he was getting paid off by the mafia,Rumlow dropped the dime on some cases,dropped bodies in others,Jamie Winters by his side every step of the way.And when it was time for a change in scenery,they changed cities,and Jamie put his weapons (the arm and his rifle) away until needed again.

* * *

  
Brock remembered asking Jamie why he took the arm off when they weren't working,he said it ws because "it's a weapon and I don't want you tp be hurt by me",he said.  
  
"Know you wouldn't do that Jamie",Brock said.  
  
"I'm sure--but accidents happen",he said.  
  
It took Brock awhile to understand what that meant.  
  
One day while on the run from the police,Brock and Jamie ducked into the woods after Jamie took a graze to one of his arms,the right one.They slowed through a water bank,hid out in an abandoned den,waiting for the police to call off the search off.  
  
They were taking too long.  
  
"If anything happens--I want you to know-That I love you,Jamie...I love you so much I---didn't mean to drag you into this--"  
  
"No.We wanted to change the world,to be heroes and we are--w-we were. We saved lives...took some but saved others.This is war,Rumlow.That's what happens",Jamie said with a harshness that surprised Rumlow.  
  
"You're right...just you and me against the world---til the end of the line",Brock said,cecking the ammunition in his pistol .  
  
Jamie though had a faraway look in his eyes again.  
  
"Just don't know when to call it quits,do ya'?",Jamie said,again ,smiling.  
  
"Like hell.You ready to do this?",Brock said.  
  
"Yeah.Kiss for good luck?",Jaimie said.Brock relented at Jamie's  
sweet smile and pulled him into a long,passionate kiss under the glow of a lighter.A moment later,Rumlow flicked it closed and readied a flash grenade.  
  
"Never get sick of that.Now let's give em' a show",Rumlow said.  
  
The two separated for the first time and meyt up at a new destination.All those days that Rumlow waited for Jamie had his heart aching,his hands shaking.All those times,he knew that he couldn't he just couldn't goon with out Jamie.He was co-dependent now.  
  
In love,if that's what you call it.  
  
But if Rumlow remembered correctly ,Jamie never returned the words.It was only wen a frantic Jamie showed up at Brock's hotel room shaken,carrying his arm and wepons to his room ,and when Jamie threw his arms around him that he understood.  
  
"I love you,Brock.I love you so much",he said through tearful eyes. He wanted ask him what happened,what he did,why he was gone so long,but Jamie was kicking the door shut already,and forcing kisses upon his mouth.  
  
"Love you--too,babe",Brock said.  
  
"It's James.My name is James Barnes Proctor.My Grand dad fought in the war-",another kiss "said I had his eyes when I was born he said,smiling,feeling a weight for his chest.  
  
"You certainly do",Brock said,having remembered the books,history lessons.Any and everything to do with Captain America pulled Rumlow in,even the Howling Commandoes,especially James Bucky Barnes.God,it was just old films and pictures,but man,could Barnes make a you blush.He was at the top of every guy's very small list of people guys would go gay for and the one that your wife would admit she'd cheat on you with it. Bucky-sexual was a thing for people.  
  
And it just so happened that James Barnes had an morbid resemblance to him.It was like if James Barnes had been chewed up .spit out and pissed on,but that used look combined with his brilliant eyes and smile and that Brock could do tis to him was something special.  
  
Minutes later,James who was way stronger than he looked was showing Brock on the bed with both of his hands,flesh and metal which was new because he never kept it on after missions.  
  
"Make love to me",he whispered into Brock's ear as he straddled his waist.  
  
"Glad you asked",Rumlow responded.  
  
Honestly,Barnes was practically insatiable.Wet kisses,to sweating skin and tangled limbs before James was slicked up eagerly riding Rumlow's cock,and leaving dents and cracks in the headboard .They spent the night and the next making love and smoking through a pack of cigarettes , filling up junk food and playing cards.Barnes-Proctor had one helluva poker face,Rumlow gave him that.  
  
But after that weekend,things changed.  
  
Rumlow awoke to a love letter in James's perfect cursive,rushed,but still easy to recognize with the words **'I'm Sorry,but I had to protect you.Don't fight back** ',scrawled on it. Not long after,his door was kicked down and a small Strike team that consisted of a redheaded woman,a man with a bow and arrow with various other agents had him surrounded.  
  
All their weapons were trained on him and Rumlow felt anger,betrayal,heartbreak--  
  
"I'm Agent Coulson ---SHEILD.And we have heard about you Crossbones.You're pretty infamous out there,killer for hire,vigilante.We're willing to offer you a job--put your skills to get use and really make a difference---you willing to accept?",a man in a suit said cooly adjusting his tie.  
  
"Do I have a choice?",Rumlow asked,looking unphased.He simply lit his cigarette as Coulsen stood,hands in his pockets,  
  
"Your partner agreed to turn himself over to SHEILD custody,said to take you too,long as you get complete immunity and not be charged for your crimes--which are alot.We've been watching the two of you and couldn't decide what to do.But after his car went up inflames,we came to meet you on our own",Coulson said.  
  
That was bullshit.  
  
That was bullshit and everyone knew it,they all knew it.  
  
But Barnes was gone now ,this was all that was left.  
  
He had to change the world.  
  
Brock Rumlow calmly put his cigarette out on the dresser.  
  
"Fine--where do I sign?",he said.  
  
But these things are never an accident,no.  
  
Not with Alexander Pierce working for SHEILD and not with Rumlow having worked there only year before he was to be trusted with Project Winter Soldier.Before Hydra asked if he wante dto change the world

Of course he said 'Yes'--Like an idiot.  
  
_**HAIL HYDRA**_  
  
Finding that inside his locker was definitely no accident.  
  
No,it was not an accident he had become the new handler,not at all.Not an accident,because he was sure that James Barnes said he didn't remember him was lying,he saw it in his eyes... they did something to him.Rumlow was sure that something was going on,something dark,something sinister--  
  
_**HAIL HYDRA**_  
  
-'and shut the fuck up!", somebody said to Barnes who was being dragged around,beaten for their amusment.They could only get away with this when he was out of it from the Chair or drugs,lest Barnes strike out and start ripping body parts.Someone was pulling at his clothes,several were opening belts and Rumlow was disgusted by it.  
  
"Alright,cut the shit!",Rumlow said,taking charge.  
  
"My bitch,my rules.If any of you dip-shits damage the goods too badly,Peirce is comin' down on my head and I'm takin' off yours.You understand?",Rumlow said,all brass and silent heavy rage that was like calm before storm.  
  
"You don't get freebies 'round here.You gotta work for it.'Sides,if this mutherfucker triggers and kills one of you faggots,I'm comin' after the rest of ya'.got it!",Rumlow snapped.  
  
"Yes,sir!",the newbies said.Some of he others not so much.Rumlow eyed one particular Agent,he read a file,a Jack Rollins,who seemed to not be heeling to Rumlows commands.  
  
"Hey you,you think you're tough shit?",Rumlow said,a sneer on his face.He Looked him up and down,nodded--then hog spit right on his shirt.  
  
"Now,do somethin', pussy!",he said,and Rollins did.Rollins and Rumlow fought it out,fought dirty,while the other watched,cheered vocally,while The Asset watched with morbid fascination,confusion,but recognition.  
  
Recognition that the man kicking the shit out of Rollins was named Rumlow--Rumlow B-something,  
  
And he knew through all of this,Rumlow was protecting him.  
  
When Rumlow finished stomping a hole in the guys's ass,he pulled back and spit blood on him,wiping his own bruised face.  
  
"Don't know what you Disney princesses been doin' all this time,but I'm the head mutherfucker in charge here,and if anybody got a problem with that,you can join Rollins on the fucking floor.I don't got time for no games,steppin' outta line.We got a mission to do,we gonna change the world .How the fuck are you a solide with no discipline?.HAIL HYDRA!",Rumlow yelled

  
Rumlow was going to be sick.But looking at Barnes,he knew what he had to do.

"I said HAIL.HYDRA!",he said and they chanted it back.  
  
"Hell yes!Now clean this shit up",he said gesturing to Rollins who struggled to his feet--and saluted Rumlow like a true soldier.  
  
"Hail Hydra",he said,his voice still.Rumlow looked him up and down and nodded.Rumlow had earned his personal respect.He could be used.  
  
"Order through pain boys,you see that? Keep your asses in order,you won't get pain",he said.He walked by Barnes and gave him swift kick for show.  
  
"You too,you ;little shit.Same rules!",Rumlow snapped.He knew how much pain Barnes could take and knew Barnes was one hell of an actor,got them through a lot back in their vigilante days.He knew to fall down from kick that hardly even hurt him,make it look good.A smirk up through his locks only Rumlow could see ,told him that much.  
  
He yanked The Asset up by his hair,dragged him to his feet.His wrists were bound behind his back ,and he was shirtless and bruised,bruises already healing,not that the others knew.Rumlow did.  
  
"Now you better have your shit together by the time we start training tomorrow.Or else you're gonna have to baby sit this creepy mutherfucker all by yourself.Remember what happened to the last guy,don't cha? Rollins here knows,so he fuckin knows better",Rumlow said,and the group looked away.  
  
"I'm gonna do the sensible thing and put this fucker on lock down,so he don't kill us in our sleep. If I find any of you got fucked over by tall dark and creepy,I know you disobeyed orders and I'll have to add on to whatever he did.Now get outta my sight",Rumlow said,as they dispersed.

But even then,they watched as The Asset was docile and obedient at Rumlow's side,against the wall,face hidden by his locks.  
  
As soon as they were all gone,Barnes chuckled and Rumlow did the same,but not as much.He sighed,looked down at The Asset and shook his head,sorrow in his eyes.  
  
"Stand up",he said and the Asset obeyed.He stood a good two inches over Rumlow but with no armor,he definitely had a smaller frame,but not by much.  
  
"Look what they did to you?",he said quietly.The Asset looked down,sad and a shamed.  
  
"I wanted to protect you",The Asset said.  
  
"You did--thank you.But do you even know my name?",Brock said .Quick flash of horror and he remembered the Chair,remembered,James screaming.  
  
"I remember your face--the house,changing the world.I remember our love...remember that you use to smoke,remember you making love to me",he said quietly.Rumlow was nearly brought to tears--but not here or now.Not in this den of snakes,no.He'll have to bleed acid and spit fire here.  
  
"Good...good.You take that--take it to heart.And know that above anyone else,you follow my orders,because I won't hurt you unless I have to,okay? You did good back there,real good.Make it look good like that always,do a good jobs,okay?",he said,petting The Asset's hair,and he smiled.  
  
"Agreed.New parameters set.Initiating system override---Agent Rumlow is Primary operative.Assigning covert mission,protect Agent Rumlow and survive long enough for escape capture.Terminate Hydra with extreme prejudice",he said with a small twist of his lips.Rumlow smirked and caught James's chin in his hand.

"You beautiful.Fucking.Psycho.I fucking love this",Rumlow said,leaning in to steal a kiss.

And for the first time in a long time,Bucky Barnes truly smiled.


	2. Moments between

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brock Rumlow figures out how to deprogram the Winter Soldier--however,he can only recreate James Barnes Proctor and not James Buchanan Barnes.After a mission gone right,Rumlow and Barnes spend time together before he has to re-initiate the Winter Soldier program.Rollins also starts to feel sympathy for The Asset

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is not all chronological order but close.Also,more vague sex

 

Brock Rumlow earned his reputation for being dedicated to Hydra--that's what they thought.He just wanted to change the world and he was gonna take care of James.

When he spouted about changing the world and talked about why certain people needed to die,he was dead serious.Hell,he had a personal hit list and even helped his superiors make tactical suggestions on how to handle Hydra business. After all,if he replaced the local police department with local Hydra Agents,he and Winter could do their own personal mission while on missions.

It helped extensively that The Asset responded well to Rumlow and Rumlow only.

"Keep a pattern.Positive reinforcement when he does good.when he fucks up,beat that fucker like he stole somethin',Ain't hard",Rumlow said. Of course the fact that Rumlow had ,in fact,taken a course in behavior health in college after his tour in Afghanistan  (but dropped out) helped and the fact he was good with the Asset wasn't even double checked.He was simply that good.

They had no idea how much of this was very much positive reinforcement and Rumlow's own reprogramming,along with Barnes scheming beside him to help him out.

Case in point ,a mission that they had done recently,that needed  to completed in three parts.

Rumlow gave The Asset four parts.Some other Hydra agents had to die,

The checkpoint,just so happened to be a park several blocks from where the assignments took place. Hydra's assignment was to kill a local arms dealer and cease control of their gang to secure weapons for Hydra. It only took Rumlow,The Asset,two men and Rollins to do it.

It was a fun one too.

See ,it's not that James Barnes or Brock Rumlow were sadists,far from it.It was just that sometimes you had to make it fun or you'd lose your sanity.

On this particular incident,Brock had to admit he and Winter were just dead wrong and understood why Rollins tried to kick his ass for this.But hell,why not make it fun?

They were in a dark warehouse,Rumlow was smoking a cigarette casually as he negotiated with a man who was being entirely too difficult.The other two,Mitchel, Coswell were looking more bored than menacing.Rollins though was looking suspect at Rumlow and unlike the others--was wondering why the Asset wasn't there with the, to look scary and get business done. It was growing dark,the game was getting old fast.

"Okay you know what? Cut the shit",Rumlow said pulling his gun out and aiming it at Travis,he was the dealer.

"You're gonna break us off or I will personally blow your head the fuck off",he said pulling his gun.Immediately the other six men with Travis pulled their guns the same that the rest of Rumlow's team did.Rollins was giving Rumlow a look that screamed fury and annoyance if it was at all possible.

It was then that they heard they heard what sounded like a mini stampede headed their way.

"What the fuck is--"

"Holy shit! Whatthe fuck is that!",Mitchel said ready to aim at the monstrosity that charged right through the door breaking it on impact.

"Take cover,don't shoot unless it's one of the dealers!",Rumlow said,casually in his seat, and screaming like something outta hell.It was wearing a black trench coat,masked and wild and wielded a rifle with a chainsaw attached to it revving it up as it sprayed shots everywhere,making sure not to hit the main dealer,Travis.

 

Rumlow though,casually fired his pistol making sure everyone except except Travis was dead.

Travis was crying in a corner as The Asset shook his chainsaw at him laughing like a psycho.

"Hey,Soldier,lay off him,we need him alive.When we're done here you can eat the other ones,just not this guy",Rumlow said.The Asset whined as the chainsaw went down.

"C'mon big guy,get outta there",Rumlow said as he approached.The Asset paused before he stiffly walked off like the juggernaut he was and stood at the door like a sentry awaiting orders.

In all honesty,Rollins himself was shaken like the other two newbiues,but was damn good at hiding it.Didn't stop his heart from pounding out of his chest though.At least he didn't piss himself like Travis did.

"Hail Hydra ,mutherfucker.We call the shots here now.This whole town?It's fucking Hydra.W're in your bars,your stores,you neighborhoods,your schools ever.The police department is ours,the fire department is ours,your life is ours.This city? This city is our bitch!",Rumlow said kicking the shit out of Travis.

"So ,you got tow choices--you supply us with what we need or you get decommissioned.Choose wisely",Rumlow said.

They left with contact information and enough weapons that they had to steal cars to get it back to the nearest HQ.

\--

While the others were outside doing their duty,Rumlow was kissing Barnes ravenously under his mask.

"You are fucking amazing",Rumlow said,grinning at himBarnes returned it before pulling is mask and goggles back on.Just as he did,Rollins was coming into the warehouse,Rumlow though was taking the chainsaw gun away from the Asset and leading him away.

"Had to calm this fucker down a bit,give him his meds.By the way,you guys dispose of the bodies.Meet me at the next checkpoint wen it gets dark.

"What about The Asset?"Rollins asked.

"Gotta do a little maintenance on this bad muthefucker",he sat,slammping Barnes on his shoulder.He smiled under his mask,not that anyone can tell.Rollins gave him starnge look,which Brock returned with a questioning gaze.

"Or...you can do it",he said shoving the Asset forward.

"Not when he's wielding that thing"Rollins said.Rumlow as laughing way too had and took the gun from The Asset and gave it to Rollins.

The chainsaw was crudely attached in a way that it was absolutely implausible to kill somebody with and to top it off,the blood was fake.Rollins sighed and roamed off,careful to keep the crude contraption a safe distance from himself.

* * *

"You were so good,so beautiful,you twisted little fuck--",Rumlow said shoving him down to the bed.

"Yes,sir",The Asset said.Rumlow frowned,pulled back,still straddling him.Rumlow frowned and felt himself going soft at the idea of what just happened.For a moment,he considered climbing off of James,but tis was one of the few chances they will get together in awhile.Frowning ,he picked up his stun rod and set it to the lowest possible setting.

"Soldier,disengage",Rumlow said,calmly.

He would never get use to this.

A quick tap to the Asset's temple and a moment  later ,dead eyes closed.Another tap and his brow furrowed.Then a gasp like he came up from drowning,,before a grin crossed the Winter Soldier's face.Instead of The Asset,James was looking back at Rumlow.

"Well ,I'll be damned--actually fucking worked",Rumlow said more to himself.

 

"Kiss me again?",James asked uncertain,is hands on Rumlow's waist now.He was always a little fuzzy when he came out,but he'd settle in.

"Whatever you want,whatever.We got all day till they get back",Brock murmured,kissing his James on the mouth,then he chin and moving over his jaw.James's eyes fluttered and he sighed as Rumlow's hands slid up his shirt,grasping his nipples.

"And I am going to fuck you so hard you little slut",he said in his ears.

"Only if you can handle it--gonna ride you straight into the fuckin' mattress.Take that dick an' fuckin' own it",he said.Brock was pleased to see him bounce out of the fog so fast--it worked better and better each time.

 

* * *

 

It was a good thing when Rumlow told them a while back what everyone was afraid of saying--that The Asset is flawed. He said this to Pierce himself,which could have pretty much ended badly--if he hadn't explain what he meant.

_"After the whole fiasco with these gun running missions,I did some searching and saw the Russians used him in hand to hand and up close and personal cases.The guy can one hit killed people.We need to take advantage of tha_ t",he said.After pulling the old files for Pierce to look at ,he was impressed and he immediately agreed,Assigning Rumlow ,Rollins and whoever else was expendable.

After all,what with the super strength in all,sometimes ,shit happens.

Brock knew this first hand,haven been bruised and aching in odd places after his last romp with The Winter Soldier.James was NOT kidding when he said he'll ride him into the mattress.The bed had collapsed under their weight (both close to 200lbs of muscle,and that Winter's metal parts.That's about 400lbs and Barnes didn't hold back, so of course this was gonna happen)the headboard had scratches too,all because when a super soldier was getting theirs,that's pretty much the only logical conclusion.

After too many wasted condoms and Rumlow nearly passed out with a very satisfied Bucky Barnes clinging to him,Rumlow finally spoke.

"You're gonna fuckin' kill me,kid",he said breathless.

"But positive reinforcement makes me perform better",Barnes said with a fake pout.Rumlow,still out of it pointed at James,poking his head.

"Fuck.You",he said.

"If we go again,you'll have a heart attack.I love you too much for that.Besides,I wanna cuddle",he said.

 

Nearly an hour later,when Rumlow was near sleep,James whispered in his ear.

"Are we changing the world?".James said.

"Hell yeah.One douche-bag at a time",he said,stroking James's hair ,before they closed their eyes.

Not long after,Rumlow had to clean him up and fix his hair so it wasn't obvious that he just got fucked silly. So when they would they get to the checkpoint,everything would seem normal.As the two men held hands,Rumlow's eyes on the road there was a silent solemness that fell between the two of them. When he pulled up to the place,holding James by his hand,Brock bit back his anger. One last kiss and those scared eyes looked back at himas he held his stun rod in shaking hands to Barnse

"Winter Soldier ,re-engage.At ease",he said.Before he coild react,James was stunned with the rod and his body jerked from the reaction to it.

Hyperventilating,he calmed himself,dead eyes looking ahead.

"Parameters met, sir.Winter Soldier reengaged.The Asset is at ease and will rest when directed",he sad.

"Fine,get outta the car",Rumlow said.  
\--

When the others got back to the check point,Brock and Winter were sparring and effectively scaring the other operatives.

"How can you come near that thing like that? He'll fuckin' kill you,Rumlow",Coswell said.

"Nah,he's fine.But I'll call him off,since you're such a pussy",Rumlow said before ending the session.  
\--

Rollins was the first one inside,and as a result,he caught that brief glimpse of sympathy in the eyes of his commanding officer as he watched the Asset sleeping soundly in an over sized hood,and sweatpants,curled up with fuzzy rainbow colored socks.

Rollins hoped it wasn't weakness.

:C;mon! You can;t tell me,you;re not laughuin' at this.You saw him earlier,now this",Rumlow said,gesturing towards Barnes who was viably smaller out of his winter soldier armor.

"You're ridiculous,Rumlow",he said,shaking his head.But it was obvious then between the both of them that what they were seeing there was not "An Asset" or a weapon,but a young man who just needed comfort,needed to be to be hugged,needed warmth from the chill.

Not only that,but he was pretty easy on the eyes...

"Hey,stop bein' a faggot and help me get our shit right.Phase Two's tomorrow,then you guys go home so we can handle phase three",he said. Jack was now unsure if he felt right about going through with the mission.

  
\--


	3. Messin' wit Rollins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The dynamics between Bucky and Rumlow,now that everyone knows that Rumlow's claimed him,plus attack of Winter Kitty.  
> Also ,Rumlow gets promoted ,meets Steve Roger's formally while The Asset is 'transferred'.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will stop obsessively updating this.I just been on this Bucky/Rumlow kick,I dunno why!
> 
> Think it's the other fics doin' this to me. Anyway,This chapter is more a character study and some progression.The chapters are kinda self contained for the most part,something I am experimenting with.Also,warnings for ablism in this chapter.As a temporarily disabled person,I do NOT approve.

 

 

In all honesty,Rollins was annoyed that his room was right there near Rumlows because he could hear everything.Everything being him and the Asset.Again.The worse part was that Winter wouldn't even spare anyone else a glance.

Once they were having a meeting and as soon as they were done,he took the Asset to the bathroom so he could take him in a stall.It was just shameless at this point.

It was no secret that Rumlow was fucking Winter,everybody knew about it.In fact,Pierce encouraged it ,said it bred loyalty into the thing.

Positive re-enforcement .

But this was getting out of hand.

It's not like Rumlow couldn't get women...or men for that matter.No,no he just wanted that thing,that creature,that monster.

(A beautiful monster,that was no lie.For everyone disgusted with it ,just as many were enamored with it.Rumors circulated in secrecy that underneath the mask and hair that was always hiding his face,the Winter Soldier was a sight to behold,savage beauty they called it)

.Cosswell was joking when he gave Rumlow shit for doing the extreme on missions,accusing him of getting danger-boners every time something fucked up happens. But Rollins was now believing it to be true.

The Asset or,Winter as Rumlow had taken to calling it was just under six feet and was all muscle,body scars and seriously,a metal fucking arm.And he'd seen the Asset without his arm,and it did NOT stop Rumlow in the least.

"Some people just like dirty shit,shit from the gutters.He use to fuck around with this blind kickboxer at some point who and us eto come back bloodied.No really,caught him fuckin' this guy in a gym in Hell's kitchen when I went lookin' for him",Ryker,one of the Lieutenants said.

 

"What the fuck,does he have a disability fetish or somethin'?",Cosswell asked.

"Like I said,some people like taking their pickins' from the gutter.Rumlow's one of 'em",Ryker said,leaning against the railing.

"Might be true,but what can we do? He's our boss",Cosswell said.

"Your boss,not mine.Don't gotta associate with that sick fucker ,not my chain of command",Ryker said.

"But if you got a problem with it,you can take it up with him or Winter",Ryker added.

"What,so he can beat the livin' shot outta us? THis one guy named Kado from our old group called Rumlow a faggot,cuz he pets The thing like its a cat.He just sicked the Asset on him right then and there and watched him beat the tar outta Kado before scarring his face and--I bullshit you not,Rumlow kicked this fucker down a laundry soot and said 'THIS IS HYDRA'.Mad disrepectful.Dude's fuckin' crazy",Aubry was saying as he lit up another cigarette,

"If I didn't know any better,I'd think he took a liking to that--that thing",Coswell said.

"Like I said,some people like dirty shit.Fact of life",Ryker added.

* * *

The next time Rollins saw Rumlow,he was reading a book on tactical warfare,in the recreation room.Just as he thought,The Asset was nestled into his side,at his feet like an obedient little pet-- and a collar--did Rumlow buy it a collar?! And cat ears.Nice

That was just fucked up.The whole scene and Rollins had enough.

"Fuck you want,Rollins",Rumlow said,not even looking up from his book.The Asset rubbed against him and he moved his hand.The Asset then ,slowly crawled over to the table to a glass dish with milk and--

"Ah ah.On the floor.You know better",Rumlow said sharply.Winter bowed his head,guilty  and waited for Rumlow to put the milk on the floor.The Asset smiled and said bashful and docile "Thank you ,sir",in his raspy voice and began drinking the milk.

"You and --that.What the fuck is this?",Rollins said,his face twisted in an odd expression.He looked up at Rollins with sultry eyes,milk dripping from his lips ,eyes that captured Rollins' own,holding his gaze.He hissed before getting up from this and attacking with claws like a wild creature.Rollins tried to fight it off ,but The Asset was slamming him down on the floor and straddling him.For a brief moment he got a full look at his face,those eyes were beautiful even when he was wild like this.

And the worse part was the Soldier seemed to be aware of it,if the way he gently pawed at Rollins with his metal hand was anything to go by.It was when he slowly dragged his paw slowly down to Rollin's belt that it came to an end.

"Heel,Winter!"Rumlow snapped. Rollins had pulled a knife on the Asset ,had it against his throat.Rumlow just laughed sadistically at the whole thing.Winter gave Rollins a grin that was all teeth before he took his metal hand and bent Rollin's knife like it was aluminum foil before tossing it.

"Oh man!Lil savage there!Don't kill 'em Winter!C'mon!",Rumlow said,gesturing for him to come back.The Asset growled at Rollins before crawling away from him and back to Rumlow's side.Rollins quickly scrambled out of the recreation room.

As soon as Rollins was gone,Brock let out an even louder laugh and Barnes let out a softer one still not use to laughing.He immediately tossed out the cat ears,hopped up on the table,took one of Rumlow's cigarette's while Rumlow lit it for him.

"That was a dick move Barnes",Rumlow added.

"They wanted a monster,I gave 'em one",James said,a smirk on his lips.He took a long drag on his cigarette and passed it to Rumlow before kissing him on the cheek.

"Love you too",Rumlow said.

"You better",Barnes said.

Rumlow hoped it stayed that way.

* * *

Things were getting a bit slow for Hydra and eventually The Asset was eventually transferred to other branches more often.Rumlow resisted the urge to ask why him,The Asset's handler wasn't transferred there,but decided against it as he didn't wanna blow his and Barnes's cover.They made love one last time,and to his surprise,Rollins had covered their asses a few times,to the point where he began to trust  him to go to the training rounds with him,while Rumlow worked on easing up Winter's programming a bit more.

By the time the Asset had come back to Rumlow three whole years had passed.Rumlow who's performance had been off since The Asset was taken away was starting to be a concern now.

It came a point where Alexander Pierce had called in Rollins to make a report on Agent Rumlow.

"He seems to be getting quite attached to the Asset.His absence has affected Rumlow's performance",Pierce was saying.Rollins was at loss what to do but like always,poker face like a champ and could easily hide it.

"He sees him as a pet of some sort.I had a dog who died and--it took me a while to get over it so I know",Rollins said,Pierce frowned.

"And nothing else?",he asked,sitting on his desk.

"Not that I am aware of,sir",Rollins said.

"You're his second in command and you know your assignment.And we all know of the other activities they get up to",Pierce pressed.

"That's true sir but--Rumlow and I don't exactly get along so I could never get close enough to assess the situation,question him",he said.Pierce nodded in understanding before sipping his glass of water.

"Then I suggest you learn to as your role in the operation is key,which makes you in-disposable.I would prefered if things stayed that way",Pierce said.

\--

As Rollins left the office,his heart was racing in not just anger,but fear,so many things piled on top.

More than anything,he was pissed at Rumlow ton the point he wanted to punch his face in.In fact,he was probalby gonna do that anyway.

As he walked the dimmed halls of the bunker that made up this makeshift base of operations,Jack's fistes were clencehed.He slammed open the door of the recreation room just in time to see The Asset curled up against Rumlow on the couch.Startled by the sound,Rumlow immediately had his gun to the intruder while the Asset was was duel wielding uzis.

-with his pants undone.

But that wasn't the biggest thing,it was his eyes.His eyes that were normally dead but looked very much alive and _aware_ which they weren't suppose to. Rollins put his gun away ,kicked the door shut and raised his hands.

"We need to talk,Rumlow",he said.

"Fine,talk then",Rumlow said,lowering his gun but still keeping it on his person.

"Call him off",Rollins said.

"I might",Rumlow said casually.Rollins sighed,frustrated.

"I mean it.Pierce just called me into his office so cut the shit",Rollins said slowly.

"You mean Alexander Pierce?",Barnes said in a way that sounded far too aware.Rollins looked at him Barnes helplessly as he slowly lowered his guns.

"Stand down soldier.Rest ,I'll get back to you ",Rumlow said approaching Rollins.As soon as he was close enough,he shoved him into the nearest bathroom to which Rollins shrugged him off ,roughly and to Rumlow's surprise,slammed him into the wall.Rumlow struggled against him,but in the half decade that they worked for Hydra,Rollins had gotten bigger and stronger than Rumlow as they were both in their early twenties when they arrived but now approaching thirty.

"You still pissed about earlier when I shoved you off the chopper?",Rumlow said.

"No,something else",Rollins gritted out,slamming Rumlow into the wall.Rumlow retaliated by kneeing Rollins in the gut and kicking him to the floor.Rollins then went for his leg and grabbed him,making him fall against the sink.

"You and that thing,Rumlow.He knows something's up with you two!",he snapped,dragging himself up from the sink.Rumlow lowered his fists,bit his lip.

"That so?",Rumlow said.

"Yeah.You're too close and soon he's gonna wanna go check on HIS Asset--or have you forgotten who his original handler was after the Soviets handed him over?",Rollins said.Rumlow chuckled.

"So that's your game.You're fuckin' snitch.That's why you're here...I mean,who watches the Watchmen,RIGHT?",Rumlow said and punched Rolllins right in the face.Rollins tool the hit,ignoring the taste of blood in his mouth.

"Shoulda hit me in the stomach --he might wanna see me again",Rollins warned.

"Nah---I shoulda put your ass in a body bag",Rumlow said.

"And Pierce would have you killed.Point is,I die,you die and if you die,I die.That's it.So something's gotta get done about this",Rollins said.

"Fine.What did you tell Pierce?",Rumlow asked,calming himself.

"That you made it into a pet.But everyone know's that's a lie.Now I'm on his radar. You better fix The Asset before he gets his hands on it ,Rumlow",Rollins said.

\--

When Rumlow returned,James was pacing frantically,hands behind his back.When he heard footsteps ,he immediatly climbed onto the couch and pretended to be sleep.

"Get up James",he said quietly.

"Brock--"

"Shhh.We gotta talk about some things",he said.

"Alright",James said.

He knew what that meant.

-

The next few minutes ,Rumlow and Barnes fought viciously causing enough ruckus to bring other Agents rushing in without an alarm at all.As the footsteps got closer,Rumlow shoved James onto the couch and kissed him hard on the mouth,which was reciprocated.

"Give 'em hell,baby",Rumlow said.

"You know I will",James said.And Rumlow placed him back in Winter Soldier mode .By the time the door slammed open,Rumlow was backing away with his gun and an unconcious Winter Soldier on the ground.

"Put him in lock up",he said tiredly,his hands shaking as he was lowering his gun.

Rollins nodded at him ,giving a sympathetic look as he escaped into the hall.

* * *

  
Pierce wanted Rumlow to be more active at the SHEILD.And in exchange for seeing Winter one weekend once per season (to keep the memory fresh),Rumlow kept his work up with SHEILD.He worked his other angles,did a little vigilante work,but wasn't quite needed as much what with The Punisher and Daredevil scaring the living bullshit outta people like he and Barnes use to .He occasionally worked with both of them and was pleasantly surprised to find Daredevil's identity (he kept his mouth shut though,they were all sworn to secrecy). Then there was Luke Cage and Iron Fist all who were there to take down those damn aliens.As soon as it was over though,they took to the streets of New York like Rumlow did and he was happy that there were others that shared his vision and his brand of justice.

  
The thing with SHEILD was that it was composed of a bunch  of ex-renegades.Half the damn staff were assassins for hire or ex-cons,mercenaries,war veterans,soldiers etc,

Basically,he was with his own kind so Rumlow felt very much at home at SHEILD.People knew boundaries,people knew to watch each other's asses and--well it was just a different dynamic.

See,the problem with Hydra was that it prayed on two base types--the pretentious and the insecure.It was also an abusive cult where members got hazed in.I mean,yes,the same happened with SHEILD.He himself got interrogated by Romanov and training with Barton was basically getting-your-ass-kicked 101.

At least after Barton kicked your shit in though,he taught you how to NOT let it happen again and everyone was invited out for a round of drinks.Sometimes Brock went,sometimes he didn't .And this time,he didn't because he couldn't because he was being pulled aside for a promotion,courtesy of Nick Fury himself.

"We want to put together a black-ops team,the best of the best.We know your history Rumlow,know what you've done in the past.But here too,you've done good work too.I'm proud to say that we want to move you from sub security to Strike,immediately starting next week.There you and your operatives would be trained to fight side by side with Captain America himself.How do you feel about that?",Fury asked.

Rumlow was speechless,really speechless,

First,Captain America!

Captain-mutherfuckin'-America ,who was there for the battle of New York ,who personally pulled Rumlow from debris,who ,armed him and the others,lead them in battle

And he was fuckkin' Cap's best friend,right behind his back...or a clone of him.No way in hell that was the real Bucky Barnes,but he was a damn close.

Now see,this is the part where being a sociopath came in handy.

"Rumlow,right? I'm sure we've met in passing.I'm honored to choose you to be part of my team.I've heard good things about you",he said with that genuine ,heartwarming smile of his.This wasn't the  Captain America smile,this was the Steve Rogers-nice-to-meet-you smile.

And from the way Steve's eyes raked over him,he probably was _very_ glad to see him.

The only person who could possibly look more perfect was Sargeant Barnes himself.And then Rogers,looked so pristine and clean,but oh,he was dirty.He was a murderer (all soldiers are ,toy soldiers) and he was a cheat.Rumlow was part of the camp that was absolutely sure that Barnes and Rogers were not so innocent (more the reaon to NOT tell him about the Winter Soldier project).

The was he could see that darkness lurking under the surface,the way he could  feel it...

Oh yeah--this was gonna be fun.


	4. Hydra Trash Party ( Winter Kitty Holiday Masacre)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brock Rumlow succeeds in breaking down most of the Winter Soldier's programming,but knows it isn't enough.Christmas spells disaster and The Asset is reminded who he really belongs to and Brock makes them pay for it.New Years Eve is spent at Josie's bar in Hells's jitchen and Barnes makes some new friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter was Nintendo Hard and consumed my life.Please read and comment.
> 
> There is also violence here an attempted rape and death n' stuff.Also homophobic language and all that so that's there.You have been warned.

 

The next time The Asset came to Rumlow was on a holiday,Christmas. It was in some log cabin out in the out in Maryland,bout an hour's drive from DC.It was a in a rather secluded place just so the sick bastards of Hydra can enjoy whatever depravity they wanted within reason.No one was torturing anyone for fun because that was not everyone's cup of tea and Pierce didn't allow it.There must be a reason for torture,even if one does enjoy it

The best things was the ridiculously strong eggnog,the Christmas strippers and the fact that the Asset was out and about.

And because everyone's an asshole in Hydra,he had to wear an ugly ass sweater.It was so ugly that even in Winter Soldier mode,The Asset kept,at random times trying to get rid of it.It was to the point where someone had to stand near him to keep the shirt on until Brock had to give him specific orders to do so.

"New Parameters accepted.Keep Fuck-Ugly Holiday sweater on person at all times,despite the cause of psychological damage incurred.Mission accepted",he said and everyone  nearby was dying accept Pierce.Rumlow was snorting into his eggnog and cautious not to look their way.

"And where did you learn such language?",Pierce asked cautiously approaching it.Everyone in the room quieted enhancing the sounds of shitty Christmas music.Abruuptly he turned around and pointed to his back.

"Those words are on the back of the garment.The Asset deduced putting it on the backward was viable alternative.Less offensive.My apologies ,sir",he said.Pierce looked and it said literally "Fuck Ugly Holiday Sweater" on it.He just chuckled and shook his head before patting his shoulder.

"Carry on then,have fun while you can.There will be work for you to do soon enough,but for tonight ,relax",Pierce said.Rumlow and Rollins both let out a sigh of relief.

"Rumlow,make sure he's well behaved",he said with an undercurrent of a clear threat,masked partially by him cooly sipping his drink.

"I'll be heading back to the Trikelion and joining my family for the night.By the way,I'll need to be speaking with you",Pierce said.He ,Rumlow and some of the other operatives left.Before Brock could get out of the door though,The Asset grabbed Rumlow's arm witha look of helpless fear in his eyes.

"No one's gonna hurt you,promise.Rollins and his team's got your back,right?",Rumlow said,a threat in his voice.

"Fine Rumlow,we'll watch your bitch.Now get outta here before Pierce comes snoopin' back in",he said.Suddenly ,the Asset in all his stiff glory lowered his head and smiled at Rumlow,before putting the cat ears back on.Rumlow smiled and Rollins face palmed.

"Oh Jesus.Come on you",Rollins grabbed the Asset who was still making doe eyes at Rumlow as he was dragged away.

After eggnog and an wrestling match against the Asset that everyone lost,individually and in groups, someone brought out a mistletoe and instructed the Asset was instructed to kiss whoever stands under it.The Asset though was actively smiling at the christmas strippers.

Eventually,that got outta hand and soon people were groping at The Asset.He sat there though,took it ,but there was murder in his eyes.

  
"Sick fucks.Nobody's gonna be satisfied until he fuckin kills somebody.Again",Mitchel said,feet up on the coffee table.

"Think they give two shits? He's got a  list of people he maimed or killed for putting their hands on him.This is only happening because he's high as fuck.Bet somebody spiked his shit.Fuckin' faggots",Coswell said in disgust .

"You're right.SHEILD's not this fuckin' gay.Probably a bunch of queers joined up so they can push Hydra to be the knew face of Pride or some shit"Mitchel added.

"Nah,plenty of homos in SHEILD,they just got more lesbians.This here is somne other shit.I mean,the guy can't even say no if he wanted too.That's fucking creepy",Coswell said.

It was only when they heard the yelling and cheering getting louder that Jack Rollins dared to bother with the situation.A crowd had formed and there was loud noises,before Rollins was shoving his way through.The sick bastards had the Asset against the wall in magnetic cuffs and were cutting off his pants.It was obvious from the way his body sagged that he was heavily drugged.Along with that,guns and tazers and stuff were drawn ,forcing him into submission.

"So who's gonna go first?!",someone called and there were far too many willing volunteers.

"Alright,I'm gonna put an end to this shit,Trust me,if Rumlow was here,these fuckers wouldn't even thinking about this shit",Rollins said,getting up.

A female Agent with full breasts and black hair was tounge kissing The Asset,while rubbing her breast against him.When the kiss was over,The Asset looked away,only her to slap the shit out of him.

"Look at me you sick bastard!You;re about to get what you been waitin' for,",she said tazer in her hand.

"Hell yeah.Rumlow's been bein' all greedy and keeping you to himself",a man nearby said,snatching his head back.

"Aw.is that a tear?So pretty when you cry",someone else jeered.

"And cry you will.I know what you can do and Rumlow's little baby dick ain't enough to wreck that sweet hole of yours you little bitch.So now the whole team's gonna help you out.You've been spoiled lately and it's time you learn your place",the woman with the tazer said,producing a whip from her jacket.Suddenly the sound of gunshots caught everyone's attention,making them scatter.Jack Rollins shoved who was left away,his gun still in hand ,

"Fuck this,party's over!",Rollins said and snatched the mistletoe,throwing it across the room.

"Hey,what the fuck,Rollins!",somebody said.He said nothing and lead The Asset to a bathroom.

"Anybody follow me and I'll fucking beat you shiftless",Rollins said.

"You stay here,you hide.If they fuck with you,you take blood,you understand?I'll go get Rumlow for you",he said firmly placing his hands on his shoulders.

"Yes sir",The Asset said, shaken.

\--

Jack found Rumlow,told him about what was happening and he immediately left his mingling to get to Winter.What he found was a complete disaster.The Asset was in the bathroom with a ,sitting on the floor ,shrinking into his sweater ,his pants gone.Along with that ,there was a broken mirror and a corpse on the floor.

"He touched me.He touched me and I didn't like it.They were told that they could do what they wanted",he said flatly.Rumlow sighed and and grabbed The Asset by its arm leaning down so that they were eye level.

"Tell me who did this,who ordered this?",Rumlow said.He swallowed a moment looked down,then answered with fury "Ryker".Rumlow nodded.As soon as Rollins stepped into the bathroom,he had a look of annoyance.The bathroom was hell and there was a body and Brock was petting that thing again and scratching the kitty's ears--ears that weren't even the hell real.

"Good,just the man I needed,clean this shit up.Me and Winter got some business to take care of",he said.

"And for future reference,don't drink the punch",Rumlow said on the way out.

"Did he do anything? How far did they go?",Brock asked ,concerned.

"Touching.I broke his neck because he threatened you.Said you are being selfish for not sharing.The others shared.They fed me drugs and tried to share.Rollins stopped it",The Asset said.Rumlow had a look of horror than anger on his face.

"Well,we ain't gonna have none of that ,not While I'm here",he said.

"And  thanks for handling this ,Jack",Rumlow said.

"Where are we going?",The Asset asked.

"Vengeance therapy .Can you walk"Rumlow said.

"Yes.The drugs are worn off,only slight dizziness.The Asset is fully operational",he said.Brock sighed and grabbed his arm.

Rumlow lead Winter down the hall,arm in arm to where the Commander of the other branch who had him do it stood with a drink and a lovely woman,another Hydra agent.

"She was there too",the Asset whispered.

They were always easy prey.

"On my count,we throw them over,1...2...

The door came open and --

"Hya,bitch!",Rumlow and Barnes shoved both of them right over the balcony to their deaths,drinks still in hand.laughing as he watched on in satisfaction.He turned to the Asset.

"Alright,here's the deal.Everyone's drunk and high off their asses,we're not.I think it's time we clean house,do a bit of undercover wetwork",Rumlow said.

"Yes ,sir",The Asset replied and solutes Rumlow with a smile.Rumlow frowned.So all this time he was in Winter Soldier mode but sliding into James.Interesting.He contemplated if he should let Barnes out ,but decided against it.

The two stealthily made their way down to the basement,killed the lights and Rumlow shot the generator,before passing The Asset a pair of night vision goggles.

"Alright,no mercy.Kill anyone you can get away with,except Rollins,but just in case,punch his lights out of you run into him.We are going to have a very merry Christmas",he said.

"Yes ,sir",The Asset said with a very scary slasher smile appearing on his face.

"Ammunition's light and gives away our position.So this is gonna be messy",he said.

  
**The score:**

2 drowned in a punch bowl (which everyone still drank from)2 with fibre wire,2 toilet bowl,1 down the stairs ,4 over the balcony,5 by fruitcake (had nothing to do with them--it was just that bad),1 from suicide .Shot himself in the head with his silencer having seen The Winter Soldier looking at him with a knife.

They finally loaded the last of the bodies into the back of a truck .For a moment,The Asset had a look of hesitance in his eyes and grabbed Brock;s arm.

"You wanna save the world kid,you gotta get dirty.This is war,that's how this goes

,Rumlow growled.And throws up all over the ground.One of the still living agents mives and he cracks them over the head with his bottle.

"Let's get rid of this shit",Rumlow says.

The Asset nodded,complying.It was disturbing how different he was than Barnes.

"By the way...I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for Christmas--didn't want anyone to have somethin' else to take.Killing off high chain command do it for you?",Rumlow asked.

"It's the most appropriate sir.I'm grateful",The Asset said

"If anybody ask's Rollins,I'm fucking my bitch.Let's go ,he said,nudging the Asset in the pick up truck.Rollins never asks what's in the back under the tarp and he doesn't wanna know.

* * *

When it was said and done,Barnes did in fact show up--but it wasn't because of anything Brock did.

"I remembered what you did to wake me,sometimes it sticks and it doens't go all away anymore.I'm happy for that ",Barnes said,dragging off his cigarette.

"How much do you remember?",Rumlow asks,lying against James's stomach in the grass,looking at the stars.

"I remember that I'm a killer,been one and Hydra has noting to do with that.That's why it's so easy",he said,dragging off his cigarette.

"All they did,was give me a different set of targets,new set of rules,and made it easier for me to kill",he said with a dark chuckle.

"Barnes! Get your shit together",Rumlo warned.James still had the grin on his face when he put the cigarett out agints his flesh with a straight face,and watched it heal,with glassy eyes.

A dead stare turns into a slow smile and soon Barnes is climbing ontop of Rumlow ,straddling him.

"The people in the world are either wolves in sheep's clothing or just sheep.Why are there so many wolves there...and if they're wolves,why am I the sheep?",he says ,his voice accented heavy,Russian as Rumlow began to figure out.

"Because that's the way God made it",Rumlow asnwered as Barnes slowly trailed his fingers downhis still clotd chest,before opening his jacket.

"Don't say that.I don't want to be an atheist",he said quietly.

"Saying that is saying God is evil and I don't want that",he said ,coming in for a kiss.

"No worshippin' evil gods,right?",he said.

"I don't worship Idols,I worship you",James said quietly.Rumlow caught his hands and he looked back confused.

"Don't do that--you'll just be disappointed",Brock said.

"Disappointment does not exist for me because I don't expect anything good.What is ,is,I have learned to understand .The devil is taking his pickings from them",James said quietly  as he ground down into Brock,who's breath hitched.

"Didn't know you were religious",he said.

"No.But Seamus use to go to far too many confessions for there to be no faith at all",he said .

"Who the fuck is that?",Rumlow asked.Barnes shrugged.

"Nother memory.Now fuck me and let  me forget",James said .

"Are you sure,after what just happened-"

"Autonomy...this is my body,I want to use it the way I see fit,do what I want with it.It's for once a decision can make and it's thanks to you.I want to do this",James said.

"Fine,just ,let me know when to stop",Rumlow said.James smiled and nuzzled Rumlow's neck before biting it,making him grab the headboard.

"Shit! Do you always gotta do that?",Rumlow asked.

"I like it and you like it to.and you like me---do you love me?",he said and for a moment that hazy confusion is there.

"Damn,I'm that obvious?",Rumlow said.

"You would not risk everything to be with me if you did not",James said,slowly rocking against Rumlow.He smiled,offered rumlow a glass of wine that was sitting on the stand by the bed in their run down motel room,offered to Rumlow ,watched him drink it down slowly before he leaned down and licked up the drops.Though he was questioning before ,Rumlow definatly getting hard now.

"Y-yeah...I might just be fucking insane--damnit,Barnes!",he said.A metal finger went to his lips followed by a slow "Shhh".He leaned down to Rumlow's ear,fingering his belt loop/

"Call me Winter",he whispered.

* * *

The next time Rumlow was called in to Pierce wasn't long after the Christmas Party.Apparently some Hydra operatives had gone missing and everyone was getting grilled for it.

"I'll be honest,nobody was really all the way there.The only thing I know is that I saw this truck out on the road where there were no other vehicles--but I was drunk so maybe not.They're probably all at home with hangovers.If not,I dunno.Most of the people at the party weren't even form this branch,so I'll be honest sir,I didn't pay attention.Besides,I left early to go hang out at SHEILD HQ for a bit before I took The Asset back to base and headed home.

It was technically true,all of it so it wasn't like he had anything to be afraid of.Peirce sighed and rubbed his eyes.Rumlow waited,his nerves jumping at him ,practically eating him alive but he hid it well.

"Fine.How did the Asset perform?",he asked.Rumlow sighed,bit his lip though he didn't want to.

"Well,but anxious.I think that the wipes make it harder for him to act normal in public and is bad for covert missions",Rumlow said.

"Are you suggesting we not wipe him?"Peirce said,curiously.

"No,that's definitely needed,but not if you wanna send him in public.People think something's wrong and it makes people pay attention to him and everyone with him.Not like he's tiny or anything,the guy's a tank,sir",Rumlow said.

"Fine then.There are things that are needed for the next mission and you and a few of our other most loyal operatives will be attending this",Pierce said.

New Years Eve,New York city,Tony Stark's gonna have a stupidly huge party with the best security money can buy.

Course,that hardly means anything because his security was Hydra anyway.

And of course Rumlow's got the means to deal with them

"After wards,The Asset will be put back into storage,until further notice.With the coming of the final stage of Hydra's plans,we may no longer have need for it.Here is everything you'll need to know.

* * *

 

Later that night,Rumlow snuck over to The Asset's quarters.As soon as he unlocked the door,the Asset was up and looking at him.He calmed when he realized who it was.

"Rumlow-"

"Call me Brock",he said.

"Yes sir",he said in that dead voice.Rumlow growled and immediately whipped out his stun wand.The Asset whined,pulled himself back into a corner.

"No...no...listen.This is how you remember things.I know,it hurts,but after this it won't have to happen again",he said.

"It won't?",he said.

"No.This is the last of it.It'll be easier for you to remember after this",he said.

"How?",he asked.

"It's your mission now.You remember .You remember who you are,no matter what.After the chair,after Hydra,no matter how long they put you away.You'll get your old self back James...you will",Rumlow said,his voice cracked.He was glad that in the dark,that James couldn't see the tears he held back and he couldn t see those dulled,dead eyes ,that of an empty headed,mindless junkie.

"New Mission assigned. The Asset will renounce the identity of The Asset.Code name Winter soldier subject for termination upon.Data is to be retrieved,new self is to be constructed. Setting new identification-standing by",The Asset said.

"That's good...that's real good.You keep doing that,keep searching for you",Rumlow said,squeezing his hand.

"Now,you go to sleep,and you dream good dreams,the best dreams.'ll be seeing you soon,Winter.I promise.I'll come back for you",Rumlow said quietly,and kissed the Asset's metal hand .Immediately ,the metal one curled around Rumlow's.

"The Asset accepts these parameters",The Asset said,but the voice was far too human for it to be he Asset alone.

It was James.

* * *

New Years was another mess but a good one.Rumlow was given permission to take The Winter Soldier out again.First,the target's car was rigged to crash to hide the poison.

Afterwards Rumlow had to let Barnes out and put The Asset away to get the rest of the Job done.Tony Stark was smart enough to know if something was wrong,so he was not to be approached until he was intoxicated (and yet The Asset still got stuck with a tracker they had to ditch).Somehow ,Barnes got close enough to Tony Stark to dip him back and kiss him full on [to get his dna and break into Stark industries and steal some blue prints.All it took was a change of hair color,some green contacts and shades to make him blend],slow dance with a drunk Pepper Potts,break dance with Peter Parker (and win which was not easy)and stealth troll Colonel Rhodes.

Meanwhile,Rumlow had to keep Steve Rogers away from Barnes and vice versa by sending The Asset to wait at a chekpoint .He then proceeded to make out and dry hump Captain Rogers in a back room somewhere.(He also used it as a valid reason to dip from Romanov) .Barnes could smell another man's scent on him  and gave Rumlow the cold shoulder until he produced Roger's cell phone with all his contacts for the mission as penance.After that ,they had hard sex in the parking lot in one of Tony's cars.

"We are so fucked if we get caught",Rumlow said into James' neck.

"Yeah? It's hot like this...being watched.Yeah you're getting off on this too,Brock",he said,shoving Brock so he could get his own pants down and climb onto his lap.

"More...fuck---I hear somebody coming!",Barnes said.

"Youre...the one who said..."

"Shut up,Rumlow!",he hissed.

A few moments of rearranging later ,they shut up and waited while a clearly drunk Tony Stark's voice could be heard echoing in the mess.

"You not gonna stay and love me?",he said.

"Gotta go to work tomorrow Tony.And you're too drunk to be following me around like this",a familiar voice said.

It was Colonel Rhodes,

"Well ain;t that a bitch",he said.

"You owe Rollins fifty",Barnes breathed out.Rumlow just responded with a glare as Barnes cackled softly.

"Tony.."

cut off by a kiss and somebody falling against a car.

The same car that they were in.

"I'll stop if you marry me",Tony said.

We're not doing that again,I'm not drunk enough for that",Rhodey slurred.

A bottle knocked against the tinted windows and Tony spoke.

"Finish this and you will be",Tony said,sliding an arm around the other man's waist.

"Only if you make your New Year's resolution,stop fuckin' so often.Two fuck ups tops,that's final",Rhodey said.

"I will do absolutely anything you tell me to do...I'd get on me knees ,right now and just suck the skin off this",Tony was saying.

"Tony,not right !"--and a very obvious,'zip came after that.

"C'mere ,my platypus,Hershey bar,come to papa--"

"Oh hell no,...Tony,it's time for bed",Rhodey said.

"But Rhodey I--

moments later the obvious sound of someone heaving and then vomit,a curse and someone bumping against the car.

"What the fuck...okay,I'm gettin' you back to the hotel",he said.

"Just wanted to take you for a joy ride in my new ride Rhodey.You could've just said no...I love that your tried to spare my feelings",Tony said ,having somehow managed drunk sarcasm

"PEPPER!"

and after that ,the two were gone.

"So we're no the same page--you still wanna do this or no?",Rumlow said.

And Barnes held up a pair of hotel room keys,specifically Tony's room ,looking guilty.

"I lve you,you know that?",Rumlow said and they spent the next two hours there before having to leave.

They also shot a cab driver by accident on the way there--but he was Hydra so it all worked out.

* * *

 

After Barnes wore Brock out once again (this was normal),Rumlow rolled out of bed ,and crawled to the shower,Barnes following with a bounce to his step.

"Damn super soldier--you're gonna get yours y-you",

"I just did and you were great as always",he said.Eventually he just threw Rumlow over his shoulder and dragged him to the bath.After that ,the twoswung by Hell's Kitchen to meet up with some friends, and watch the countdown.James (Jamie Winters as they remembered them) r.He specifically gave Frank and Logan some locations of Hydra bases to storm as well as git a personal update on who was who and any knew Supers who showed up (who weren't mutants.SHEILD had a full database on them ).

The only awkward thing was seeing Matt Murdock's tubby boyfriend who was quite literally Rumlow's opposite in every way shape or form.But Foggy Nelson was a cool guy who knew how to keep his mouth shut.

The only bad thing was a situation that occurred when a guy bumped matt ,making him spill bear all over his shirt.He then said "What the fuck is a blind guy even doing at a bar?",which rubbed Murdock the wrong way.He was already putting down his cane and rolling his sleeves when Foggy stopped him

"Matt,we are not drunk enough for this! I'm still responsible for my actions and you should be too",Foggy Nelson said,grabbing Matt by the arm.

"I don't like him ,Foggy,needs to be taught a lesson",he said.

"That's the alcohol speaking",Foggy said,trying to pry the bottle from his hand.

"No it isn't.That's me being honest",Matt said and called out to the man.Tired of the shit,Rumlow just flashed his gun under the table at the guy.

"You ain't gonna do it",he said with one of his friends nearby laughing.

"Try me,bitch",Rumlow said and turned the safety off.Shaken ,the man backed off and ran outta the place.

"Eh ,Rumlow! You know better!",Josie called across the room,making Matt and Foggy chuckle.

"How does she always know what happened,and how does she know it's me?",Rumlow said putting it away.

"Because it's not Frank",Matt said.

"And speak of the devil",Rumlow said as the bell rang .

"Actually,I'm right here",Matt said and Foggy slapped his arm.  Frank ,Logan and Laura filed onto the darkened bar and immediately approached.

"Why do you have to know all scary people,Matt?Why no normal friends?!"",Foggy said.

"Because it's more fun this way",Barnes said,downing a shot,despite his inabilityto get drunk with small amounts.He did have to make it look natural.

"Normal's borin'.If you're fuckin' him though,you may have to look in the mirror ",Rumlow said,and got up to greet Frank and the others.

After debating on whether or not they should go to time square,they settled on a game of cards,which no matter what games they played,James seemed to be disturbingly good at all of them as did Laura who spent most of the time eying him silently.None of them were talkers except for Foggy but that was just fine,none of them were talkative.

  
**10**

..Banes slid his hand into Brock's ,squeezing it tight..

**9**..Rumlow smiled at Barnes an..

**8**..pulled him closer

**7** Grinning,Barnes lowered his head

**6** he smiled back5...their eyes met.

**4**...Rumlow felt his heart pounding in his chest.

**3**...Barnes did too...

**2**....they leaned in for a kiss

**1**..

and the bar erupted in cheers.

"Thank you",Barnes said,his eyes tearing.

"For what? Being a dick?",Rumlow said.

"For making me feel human again",James said.

* * *

-

James was the one left standing outside while Rumlow arranged some things with Frank and Logan. It was then under the cool breeze that he was approached by Laura.

"I know what it's like to be a weapon too.It get's better.It does,I promise",she said looking up at him.

"How do you know what I am and how do you know-"

"Project X-23 in the flesh",she said,withdrawing a hand from her pocket.She produced a set of metal claws from her knuckles right through her leather gloves.

"I was to be decommissioned after I went rogue.They made me to a weapon,I turned against them,I walked away.Things are better now",she said.

It was then that he became aware of the careful stillness that was disciplined into her much like the Asset.

"I believe you",James finally said.

"Good.I'll support you in whatever way you need me to.All you have to do is ask",she said a small smile on her pretty face.James thinks that in another world,he'd like a girl like her,but this isn't that world.

He already had someone to love him.

* * *

 

After the festivities they headed back to their last parking  lot where their ride was waiting for them.

When Rumlow came outside,he waved to Laura and the others,before linking his arm with James's and giving him a quick kiss.

"This year's gonna be a good year",he said as they stepped into the snow.

"I believe you",James said smiling.

"Our ride's gonna show up soon,Rollins as usual.Wanna go fuck with Rollins' again?",Rumlow said and Barnes gave a mischievous smile.

Minutes later,their ride pulled up an Rollins stepped out of the vehicle confused...then...

"WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!",Rollins screamed.

"God I fuckin' love this!",said and him and Barnes were laughing like maniacs.


	5. Before the Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Winter Soldier's memories are starting to surface more before he is put back in Cryo.Being without Winter is has made Brock seek solace in Steve,but he backs out when Steve confesses to falling in love.Brock drops the dime on Pierce and tells Fury and Maria Hill about project insight and he discovers his own name on the list as well as others.Laura Kinney is now an Agent of SHEILD and Sheild ad Hydra will soon clash.Matt and Foggy prepare for the legal shitstorm that's gonna come from this mess

 

This was the last time he would see James for a whiled,he was told.It'd been a month and the  that he came back,he  came back more beast than man , came back confused and feral.He'd often just hold him,groom him and cuddle before taking him back.But with the recent retrieval of some of his memories,he was doing better than before,less vapid,more of him there.Apparently Rumlow's crack shot idea worked.

It wasn't really hard;the machine shocked parts of his brain that controlled memory and awareness.Rumlow just had to wait for it to heal and provide just enough electricity to generate brain activity,and let the super serum do its job.

Today was the day that he went on the last mission with the Asset before he went away again.Before James would dissapear and maybe get a new handler,go to another branch

 _Maybe forget about their love_

For now though,there was this,this moment ,these lovely few moments.They had successfully broken into Stark Industries ,taken what they needed on a flash drive,made hard copies and destroyed it before Stark could catch them. Of course he knew what library they used,but it would do him no good if he couldn't recognize the thieves who did it.Now what was left was a victory celebration,celebration for what?

"Us",James had said,thick Russian accent rolling off his voice as he clinked his bottle of vodka against Rumlow's shot glass.He and Rumlow were hardly fitting into a tub together with far too many bubbles in it,too man limbs but he liked it anyway.

"You can hardly get drunk,don't even know why you're going for it",Rumlow said.James chuckled at this.

"There is a secret.Cough syrup or pills before actually works.The good buzz instead of being unaware like the others.Plus,this lasts.For these scientists and engineers to be so smart they are stupid.I learned this back in Russia",he said.

"Do you miss Russia?",Rumlow asked.

"I missed the little spiders--the red one more",he said distantly.Then slowly,his voice changes,the heavy Russian accent giving way to the American one Brock was more familiar.

"And there was a cat outside my window that I us to feed--had a blonde with stripes and blue eyes.Small scrappy thing use to fight the bigger ones for food,so I started feeding him",he said.

"In Russia?It'd freeze to death ",Rumlow said and then the Soldier chuckled.

"No,in Brooklyn ...I'm sorry but I don't remember many  details if you wanted to ask",James said,looking ashamed.

"Not your fault.I told you it'll get better",Brock said softly.

"I believe you",James said and finished the bottle of vodka.

"Russia has better vodka",he promptly said.

"Then we'll go there some day to prove it",Rumlow said.James smiled sadly.

"You said that we'll walk away from here ...how much longer?",James asked.

"Soon babe...real fuckin' soon",Rumlow said.

"You promise?",James asked.

"Yeah,I promise.I'll do it or die trying",he said and their hands brushed beneath the water.

"Me too.If we survive,I want another cat like the one from before--Id name it Stevie",he said, a far away look in his eyes.Rumlow hesitated a moment before he smiled uneasy.

"Never gave pets human names but hey,knock yourself out",he said.

* * *

As soon as they got back from the assignment,The Asset was called away,called away to Pierce ad then he was gone.It had been months now,it was fall now ,near a year passed since he'd been with James.Nowadays,they just take him to a cage and they have to speak through laws,through training exercises and then goes away.But these times are only with The Asset,never James Barnes.Rumlow was again,mostly on SHEILD detail,running himself ragged so he didn't have to stop to think.

Ever since they took away The Asset,Rumlow had to get use to sleeping at night again.

This was near impossible because his old traumas ,the ones so deep in his bones the ones that turned him into a renegade,into Crossbones were slowly edging to the surface.Being constantly under the watchful eye of Hydra had kept him on his toes,kept him moving.Winter's warmth that was for Brock only and no one else kept his head on straight,gave him a reason to live.

But right now were too many dreams about the people he loved smiling at him and telling him

 _"You're special sweety"  
_

_"You'll make a difference"  
_

_Change the world_

 _"Make things better "s_

But the worst of the worst were 

_"Daddy? Why's the world broken?"_

  
_"I dunno,but I wish I could fix it"_

And his little girl would look up at him with his eyes and his smile,on her mother's brown face,with her curly hair that would fly behind her as she ran through the grass.

  
_"You're gonna get the people who hurt mommy,right?_ "

  
_"Yeah sweet heart,I'm gonna get em",_ he had said.

His daughter's mother Brea was a member of the reserves.Brock and her were never together but they were friends,good friends.

It was Brock,Byan and Brea and they knew each other better than they knew themselves.They were suppose to go to NYU together,get married to their respective partners,live in the same neighborhood and all.But life happened,Bryan was arrested for a crime he didn't commit,Brock and Brea turned to each other in a moment of grief (didn't work out,they knew it wouldn't always knew).As teen parents they didn't have many options,so they joined the military because Brock's brothers Eric and Jayden who were so many years older ,near thirty to his sixteen so he barely saw them (he was the late baby nobody saw coming) .Even then though,he knew them.

Brea joined the reserves,made Brock stay in school because  'he ws the smart one' (yeah right).Brea wasn't suppose to see combat but the people up top always change the rules for their benefit and toy soldiers had to march.Rumlow played daddy and spoon fed their daughter his dreams of hr mother coming home.

She never did.

And he could do nothing about it accept avenge her.

He went over there,killed too many people,lost too many,but he couldn't get that faceless killer,the one who took his wife

 _But I can get the rest of 'em  
_

   
Crossbones could at least.

And then the bus blew wit his daughter on it and killing all those people didn't mean jack shit.

He couldn't face his wife's family when she died and he didn't even go to his own daughter's funeral because what kinda father ,what kinda husband what kinda _man_ was he?

Protect and serve don't mean shit.

So that's when he packed up,moved away,went back out into the cold where it was safe.Where he couldn't see his victims only their crimes,where he could pay blood fro blood for blood.

And he was alone,so alone,just him and some bullets and some smokes and some liquor and his pain.

And later a broken soldier,relic in time that was James Barnes.Who like him had everything torn away from him and all that was left was his finger squeezing the trigger too many times until the chamber stayed empty.Shedding so much blood that the devil himself could be summoned with it.

 _We'll fix the world_

That was mission Impossible like a motherfucker.

Then he lost James,found James,lost and found him again and again.But unlike everyone else who disappeared,he kept coming back.

And then James had been gone too long ,longer than usual. He comes around sometimes,smiles sometimes.He wears the kitty ears,and if not ,he rubs the fur while staring into space because he said it helps him remembers.Rumlow knows because he programmed him to remember it that way...so was he better than the others?

He has no idea what happens and why,but every time Winter comes back he's more in pieces,and every time he pulls out the stun rod,it's like he's awaken form an eternal sleep and is more alive then he was even back when they met.

But he has none of that now.Just cold clinical SHEILD that pretends to be warm,its lukewarm because there is warmth,just the distant kind.Not burning like acid fire Hydra.All den of snakes like that was going to fall to pieces,that much was obvious.Cut off the head ,another would grow--Rumlow was gonna stab it in the heart.

But for now,he couldn't sleep and the only safe option he had under his belt was Captain Rogers,their resident adrenaline Junkie wanting to spar with him in the middle of the night,because apparently Caps doesn't sleep so well,but unlike everyone else,he didn't actually need to.

* * *

"Couldn't sleep either,Rumlow?",he said when Rumlow opened the door .

" That wasn't creepy at all",Rumolow said sarcastic.

"Sorry--I just have a habbit of recognizing the footsteps of everyone I meet",he said ,lowering his fists a moment,and having the decency to look little bit embarrassed.

And he was very cute when he was embarrassed.Steve Rogers hit the punching bag again and Rumlow was mystified that the thing didn't already fall of the hinges.

"Shit,what do they even reinforce that with? I've seen you tear car doors of the damn hinges",he said.He'd seen Barnes do it too--with his flesh hand at that.He just outright punched through the hood to get someone's steering wheel in one of there 'Messin' wit Rollins' moments'.

Itw was a beautiful sight to behold to,the power and precision and.

A loud noise caught Steve off guard when he finally did punch the bag hard enough to do damage and the thing flew across the damn room.

"That was sexy.Way to make a guy feel helpless",Rumlow said.He remembered saying that when he watched Barnes roundhouse kick a punching bag right off the chain in single swift move.The grace and power behind his movements,precise and perfect like everything else about him.He remembered the feeling of those powerful legs around his waist pulling him deeper ,clutching his hair.

  
_"Gonna put you to work,Brock...make you fuck me 'til you pass out.Then I'll wake you up for round two",Barnes said,grabbing his dick  
_  
"Hey,some people are into that sorta thing",Rogers said.

 _"What the fuck,Barnes"_

 _"See this here? I own this.It's not yours anymore,not while I'm out.Your dick only gets wet if I say it does",Barnes said yanking at Rumlow's belt.It was insane how some days,he was a submissive little kitten and others he pounced on Rumlow like a lion.  
_

"You one of those people?",Rumlow asked Steve,his heartbeat steadily rises,and he knows what this is.

"Wanna find out?",Steve said back,before he could stop it.

This was just unprofessional.

They both laughed it off though because the alternative would be jumping each other again.

 _Lonely without you ,Winter..._

"Hey cap,you feelin' okay? Do you need--",before he could stop it,Rumlow was being pinned to the wall and the Captain's mouth on his.For a moment he panicked,then returned the kiss,grasping at the other man's shirt.

He remembers that James was a vicous thing when it came to this and sometimes it wasn't even on purpose.It was the strength,the serum,the thing that made Rumlow feel helpless and give up and trust this,trust what was happening.

Then

 _I love you...do you love me?_

The kiss broke and Rumlow's hands went to Steve's chest.

"I'm sorry,I just ...I gotta go",Rumlow said and Steve was frowning.

Normally this wasn't hard.Normally,they'd get their rocks off and call it a night,but lately,it's been getting too close,Steve's been getting too close.

Steve though was sad,and lonely and tthough the energy from sparring,fighting ignited something that shoved oit away,being in his bed felt lonely and gross and sick and disgusting and low,low,low.

"How about lunch this weekend?",Brock said.

"Alright.My treat.Just let me know and I'll pick you up--if you wanna talk about it",Steve said looking relieved.

"And old soldier's war stories is all.Somedays it hurts to think,hurts more to feel",he said.

"Some days you just stay up because the bed's too soft and the world feels like it isn't right and you're not right",Steve aded.Rumlow nodded.

"And you just get so lost in it that it's suffocatin' you--

"And you don't wanna climb out"Steve finished,looking Brock in his eyes.He sighed,walked back to Steve then hugged him.

"I wanna say everything's gonna be alright,but I don't know",Rumlow said his voice cracked.

"Then don't ",Steve said and returned it.

* * *

It was obvious Rumlow was in deep shit and he needed to get out.

Steve _was_ too close.And though Brock Rumlow was a son of a bitch,he would break into your house,break your bones,break your care and wreck your life but he drew the line at breaking people's hearts.He could stop someone's heart but breaking someone's heart was a problem for him,especially someone like Steve.It's a different type of knife that cuts,that bleeds that always,always twists to hurt even more.

He had to get Steve outta here.

What was also obvious now was that Rumlow had to protect Winter too,he had to get him outta here,get James.James Barnes -Proctor.

A name that wasn't even real...but Rebbecca Barnes Proctor was.

She was the sister of Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes of The Howling Commandos all the way back in World War II.That in itself had him confused at some point,until he realized it may have been a mistake on the part of Barnes who didn't remember.

Which was another problem...why was he still alive?

Far as Rumlow was concerned,he had to be a clone or something.Maybe they found dead tissue from Barnes' body ,cloned a new one but it was imperfect,hence the metal arm.Then they went and shot it wit the super soldier serum and there he was.

That's what made sense on paper.

But the thing is this; Barnes was too human,acted like he had a life and memories.And then he'd go into old time speak from back in their time and then he would listen to old tunes and he was enamored with swing dancing and seemed too well off with it.While they were in Brooklyn all those years ago,he pointed out things he said that his grandfather remembered but the details were too vivid.

So this is how Brock Rumolow came to realize that his Barnes was that one one and

And it was disgusting.

How could they take a man who died like a soldier in battle,fought their dirty wars and then turned him into a monster?

(he would never be a monster to Rumlow .No,just his savage beauty,not a monster,never that).

It was a personal affront and disrespect to any and everyone who had ever fought in a war at any point ever.Soldiers were used things,but this one they ran him into the ground and dragged him through mud and shit and filth and just kept it running.

The only rest he had was when he was with Rumlow and there was no telling what they were doing to him now. Not only did Rumlow owe it to Barnes to set him free,but he owed it to America,to every war veteran,every soldier who ever existed,he owed it to the world,to set things right.

 _We're gonna change the world_

So late at night he was in a closet with a laptop going through files under the cloak of darkness,digging and digging and digging.

Hydra was gonna fall,this was inevitable.But he had to get Winter out before this happened ,hoep Steve didn't get to messed up in the crossfire. He was all Brock had left,all he had left. And if Brock couldn't save even him--

Then what was the point of even living?

There was none.

* * *

 

The next time Brock and Steve met was on a mission.They were in a helicopter flying over the Indian Ocean to their destination.

"The target is a mobile satellite launch platform: The Lumarian Star. It was sending up their last payload when pirates took them, ninety-three minutes ago",Rumlow said as he pulled up an image of the ship in question.

"Any demands?",Steve said.

"A billion and a half",Rumlow answered.

" Why so steep?",Steve asked.

 **"** Because it SHIELD's.",Rumlow said.

 **"** So it's not off course, it's trespass",Steve said a hint of bitterness in his voice.He was use yto this but hat didn't mean he liked it.After discussing the mission a bit more Steve added--

"What's Sitwell doing on a launch ship? Alright, I'm gonna sweep the deck and find Batroc. Nat, you'll kill the engines and wait for instructions. Rumlow, you sweep aft, find the hostages, get them to life pods. get 'em out. Let's go",he said.Rumlow was annoyed now,hoping Sitwell didn't do anything stupid.Sitwell may have been liked at SHEILD but he was a snake in the grass and was in good with Pierce and some higher ups,thus he never had to do much grunt work like Rumlow and alot of the other agents.  
   
"STRIKE, you heard the Captain. Gear up",Rumlow said.

* * *

Barring the fact that he had to watch Captain America throwing himself off of the jet which nearly gave him a heart attack,the mission went pretty well.He watched Steve one shot most of the damn ship before that one moment came where Steve didn't see the enemy coming so Rumlow took him down while he was parachuting his way onto the ship.  
-

By the time Steve called Rumlow again,saying he needed him,Rumlow was able to see in his eyes he was exhausted with life.So he sat on his cough,let Steve lean on his shoulder .He couldn't deny Steve as he poured out his heart about how the world changed ,about Peggy about the Smithsonian and how he secretly tried to kill himself when he sunk that ship all those years ago.

"You,Natasha,Sam,Laura--people who I feel close to instead of like faceless.I'm not just Captain America with you guys",he said.

It wasn't suppose to go this far but it did.

Started with slow kisses,gentle touches,ended with Rumlow getting shoved down into the mattress,Steve climbing on top of him pinning him down.

"So how're we doing this ,Soldier?",he said.

"On my terms",Steve replied breathless and came in for another kiss.

This was going to be the time they went all the way,the first time that Brock gave himself to another man since Ricky Santos from college use to fuck him,then turned around and called him a faggot when he got caught.Brock got his ass kicked for it and he paid his attackers back with a personal ass kicking for all,to which he got expelled and again,his future down the tube and it was all because he was a stupid fuckin' queer who wanted to get fucked.

Brock paid the bastard Ricky back by shoving him into moving traffic and vowed to never let another man bitch him again.

Sometimes when James was on his knees and sucking his cock like his life depended it,sometimes he used his fingers...that would be enough more than enough...that was safe.What Steve wanted--wasn't.

"Just your fingers",Brock said,and that was more than enough. Steve shoving all four of them inside him and driving him over the edge.He couldn't quite give Steve everything ,not when Steve was hungry like this and not with his James waiting for him .

When Steve had fallen asleep,Brock left him a gentle kiss and slipped from his bed.He needed to make some calls ,get some favors,pull all his resources for what was about to come.

A war.

* * *

Thus far,he had half a plan in motion.Nelson and Murdock had enough evidence to be able to defend Barnes,if chargesw were to be brought against him now.Also Laura Kinney was now on secretary at SHEILD haven been convinced by Logan who worked with Fury before to give her a job. This meant that she had full access to the computers and could work her magic to help Brock get in.

There it was,Project Insight.

The Magnum Opus of Hydra that would ensure that any and everyone who opposed Hydra or would be threat to them would be destroyed.

Brock's name came up on the list,in the top fifty as a matter of fact.Now wasn't that something?

  
Also...CIA Agent Jack Rollins?

Now that was interesting...

All the Avengers of course (not that it would work on the hulk),hell Nick Fury was even there as was Maria Hill ,Pepper Potts,Colonel Rhodes and PHil Coulson...who was suppose to be dead...that was something that he would have to look into .

Matt Murdock,Franklin P. Nelson (Matt's new man),Frank Castle,Luke Cage,Danny Rand,Misty Knight ,Jessica Jones, Peter Parker,Wade Wilson,Neena Thurman ,James Howlett,Laura Kinney ,all in the top fifty also.People that Rumlow personally knew,spoke to,fellow vigilantes who fought the good fight.

Then there was Professor Xavier whom was a man that Logan seemed to know dearly,who helped take care of Laura.

Hydra was going to take them out.

And the most horrifying part was the person under the slot reserved for the biggest threat to Hydra.

The Winter Soldier himself,James Buchanan Barnes.

Jesus...that meant he was the real deal! Not a clone,not a descendant,but it was really him.The Asset was without a doubt now,it was really , _really_ him.

"This is so fucked--I don't get paid enough for this shit",Rumlow muttered to himself.

In context,it made sense.Barnes had fought Hydra during WW2,knew of their existence all their practices.He also upon regaining his memories,will remember _all_ of their locations,names,faces,made worse by the fact he was a super human with extensive knowledge of their inner workings,an _actual_ reason to want revenge.He had outlived everyone who started Hydra even Arnim Zola,he was in the Red Room,even outlived his creators,was there before Pierce,hell Barnes was around before SHEILD,came into existance! he knew _everything_ about _everyone_ who ever dared looked Hydra's way.He most of their political assassination,could point out who did what when and how ,their technology ,the staff,their affilates...

Bucky Barnes was _the_ key witness to everything and their longest running Hydra Agent in history,the Fist of Hydra, and a prisoner of war,a victim.Of _course_ he would be the first person they wanted to get rid of,he was the key to their downfall.

Rumlow couldn't help but laugh at the irony of all of this.

It wasn't just about their love,wan't even about feelings,fuck that.This was about the fate of the entire world...the fate of the world now in Rumlow's hands.

"Said I was gonna fix the world,but damn",Rumlow said.

He shut his laptop,tucked it away and carefully slipped from the janitor closet.When he shut the door,he came face to face with Maria Hill herself.

She had a gun to his face a hand out and he was sure with the laptop in hand,he wouldn't be able to get away without getting shot.Sure,he mioght survive,but if it wasn't graze,he would bleed out before he reached the nearest exit.Woerse case scenario,he killed the Black Widow (unlikely ) and then had SHEILD agents up the ass to deal with,which with Captain America still on base and wanting blood,he was unlikely to survive.He had only one choice.

"What were you doing in there and what's on the computer.Last chance before I end you",she said.And the hardness in her eyes her voice let him know she wasn't kidding.Sighing,Brock gave her the laptop,no questions asked.

"I need to speak to Director Fury",he said low.

"Why?",she demanded.

"SHEILD'S been,compromised",Rumlow said.

* * *

The next day,there was the meeting between Captain Rogers and Director Fury concerning project Insight and Rumlow was sick to his stomach at the though.

'This is how the world dies',he kept thinking.He though that at he thought of all the different ways he could murder Alexander Pierce whenever the man was within his presence.He thought of the fact that if he did that,he'd be killed on the spot,unless Rogers or possibly Rollins was there to stop it.Of the guns he carried on him,he had sixteen rounds each,which meant that he could only kill his way through maybe the first wave,half the second.

After the meeting with Captain America,Rumlow was handed a note by Maria who asked him to lunch.

"Tell me everything you know and tell me what you need and I'll report to Fury",she said.

"I may have purged the laptop,but I have the real list of names for everyone on the kill list for Project Insight,which was suppose to be top secret,no one but Pierce knows about it.There's a reason for it.You and Fury are both on it",he said .

"Fury's not gonna like this,I'll need proof",she said.

"I'll give it to you but first,we have to talk business",he said.

* * *

  
"I have to wonder what brings you back here all of the sudden,Bones",he said before Rumlow even approached him.

Even if the man was blind,eerie time he did this it scared him shitless.More so since he insisted on keeping the room dark.

"Meeting.You and Castle and Logan.Laura's shit went through,she's now and Agent of SHEILD",Rumlow said.

"I'll congratualte her when I see her",Matt said and Brock shook his head.

"Yeah,okay,Murdock",he said,pacing.

"There is something on you're mind...you're not happy,so,ething foreboding,I can guess",Matt said rewrapping his bandages.

"Are you sure you're not psychic alopng with the other thing?",Rumlow said a smirk on his lips.Matt just chuckled.

"Not that I'm aware of.Haven't seen any visions lately",he said.

"Oh ,really Murdock?",Rumlow said smiling,and Matt grinned.

"I can be an opportunist at times",he said.

Suddenly without warning,Rumlow pulled Matt into a hug.

"You take care of Foggs and Karen and everyone else and let them know you love em' okay?",Brock said softly.

"Is there something that I can do?",he asked quietly.

"Yeah.Don't come to DC.I mean it.You won't come back alive and then who's gonna protect these parts? You do good work here,you and Frank,though I wish you'd pull a knife on somebody for once",he said.

"I do what I can .Thank you",he said quietly.

"Just...if you don't here from me in three months...you know what happened.Make sure you tell everyone the truth about him,okay? Pass it on to Parker.He'll know what to do with it",Brock said.Matt nodded solemnly.

"I will.We'll make sure everyone gets the real story behind this",Matt said.

As Rumlow was zipping up his bag and leaving Matt told him

"Good luck,and God bless",he called.Rumlow waved absently before he was gone.

\--


End file.
